After my misogynistic female~only “Companion” list, comes this bloke~only rundown of actors who Blogtor thinks would make an excellent choice for The Master after John Simm leaves the role (whenever that may be…). Just missing out on a place were Tom Baker and David Tennant. Now, what hunks made the Top 10…?
Now, to be honest, I wouldn’t have had old Firthy in the list – he’s a “proper” movie actor, after all (despite St Trinians and Bridget Jones’ Diary 2) – but after his positive comments regarding Doctor Who, the Firthster is most definitely in! He also wants to play a villain which is handy. I envisage old Colin as a more laid back, suave Time Lord than Simm, and much more in control of his inner drummers.You know, if you’d told me he was the Midnight Monster from the 2008 episode, erm, Midnight, then I would not have batted an eyelid. Not one bit. The Morganator, as some refer to him, has the typical scowl of as emotionally unaffected/confused teenager (insert “aren’t all teens like that?” gag here) that makes him perfect for a “monster”. And what better monster than Gallifrey’s blackest of sheep, The Master…One of my favourite things to do, when pottering around the house, is to say the word “potter” in the style of Alan Rickman (he was in the Harry Potter films, apparently). But what could be better than Alan Rickman purring the name of Hogwart’s finest? That’s right, the Rick~o~tron slurring “Dock~tor” as he hatches yet another diabolical scheme…What? Benny Thundersnatch and not his Sherlock nemesis Andrew Scott?? Yeah, you read right! Scott, for me is too obvious a choice after his masterful role as Moriarty and it would be refreshing to see Thunders play a nasty piece of work. Uh oh, hold on – that’s what he’s already doing… #satire Holmes, despite being a “goody” is, really, a “baddy” (in terms of people, at least) and his phone~wielding, nasty persona isn’t too far from Simm’s portrayal…Those familiar with the brilliant UK sitcom The IT Crowd will be well aware of this guy. Berry is, without wanting to use the world’s most overused cliche, a larger than life character and perhaps the perfect accompaniment to Matt Smith’s energized and slightly zany Doctor. His comedic persona is not unlike a cross between Eric Roberts and Anthony Ainley; one can imagine a scenario where, instead of world domination, he invents a lady~magnet to satisfy his Earthly lusts…Chewy, as his BFFs call him, did some top actoring up against Christopher Eccleston (who older readers may remember starred in GI Joe) in the BBC’s recent, The Shadow Line. This was after a stab at the big screen with a diverse range of movies such as the apocalyptically woeful 2012, the “interesting” American Gangster and the genuinely brilliant Children Of Men. (Nerd~o~trons will also note that he starred in Serenity.) Perhaps he’s put notions of Hollywood behind him and ready to embrace the biggest role on the small screen…Bosh! I’m The Master *punch* Move it you nonce! *pushes out way* Now, where’s my TARDIS? *punch, punch* Did you nick my motor, Doctor? *punch* You look too young to be driving a Type 40 matey *punch* Maybe I’ll just take your keys *snatch* And who’s this bit of totty? *stomps* His assistant? *grabs* You’re mine now sweetheart *Vwrop vworp*Cooo, ain’t he dreamy? (I say this, I’ve no idea if he is or not.) Matching Matt Smith’s “youth” (he’s positively ancient now though, surely?), Whishaw could replicate The Doctor’s personality in the same way that Simm was Tennant’s shadowy reflection. Sadly, for us, his star seems to be on the rise and Benny boy is currently filming the new James Bond Rimming movie. But, as he showed in last year’s yawn~fest The Hour, he’s still prepared to slum it on the BEEB.Cooo, ain’t he.. uh, done that already. Being Human’s Mitchell has trotted off to the big time to star in The Hobbit (along with Marty Freebles and Benny Thundersnatch) so perhaps we can nab him as The Master before Turner becomes the internationally renowned handsome man that he’s destined to become. His rakish charm, so evident in the sadly short~lived Desperate Romantics, would make for a very different kind of Time Lord – perhaps one where trouser~tightening is a weapon…He may very well have played a young Dennis Thatcher in The Iron Lady recently (to delightful affect, it should be said), but the Lloyd~a~tron was evil personified as Baines in 2007’s Human Nature/The Family Of Blood. An absolute stand~out performance. The great-great-great-grandson of Charles Dickens (no, really) starred alongside the current Master in C4’s The Devil’s Whore so maybe he picked up a trick or three from Johnny Simm. Failing that, Lloyd should play Michael Fassbender in a film of his life story…
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